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The Ribbon Organizer

It’s Sunday.  I don’t really like Sundays.  They are so boring.  I am going stir crazy in the house, but it’s so freaking cold that I don’t want to go out.  Looking for a project.  I should really straighten out that closet.  Ugh!  I have this closet where everything that I don’t know what to do with goes.  Last night I opened it to put a Chia plant that someone gave me in there and the whole thing exploded on me.  I mean I just touched the door and it sprung open like s printer goes out of the block in a 100 meter dash.  I got knocked over by all for the crap that I have in there and then it was all over the floor!  No room for the ch- ch- chia.

So, I need to organize, but the thought of doing that closet is making me nervous.  I keep sitting here on the couch reading the paper looking at all that crap on the flood and thinking I should go organize everything and then I see an interesting article about macroeconomics that gives me an excuse to stop looking at the pile of crap!

OK.  Let’s see what Martha has as the craft of the day.  A ribbon organizer.  What a good idea!  Even I could do that and then I would not have ribbon all over the place.  

Making the Ribbon Organizer

Use a shoebox.  I am sure that I have that in that pile of crap.  Use a utility knife to make grommets.  Oh, I don’t have those.  But it says I can make slits instead.  Cool.  Ok. Make a 1/4 inch hole on either end of box, place the ribbon spools inside then a 1/4 inch dowel.  Oh, I don’t have a dowel.  I’ll use some of those wire hangers that I have in that pile of mierda when I replaced them with wooden and satin ones that Martha said I needed.  Ok. Slide 1/4 inch dowel through one end, through spools and the other and  then thumbtack the dowel on each end to keep from “shimmying” into box.

OK.  I can do that.  Looking for a shoebox in this crap. Ok. Done.  Making slits with kitchen knife.  Not as easy as it seems.  Well, the slit goes all the way across the box because the cardboard was too weak to have 5 separate ones.  Ok, I just need ribbon.  

Oh crap.  I don’t have any. <calling neighbor>  Oh great she’s bringing it over.  I told her I need it for a surprise.

Ok, now I am cutting the wire hangers with lovey’s hacksaw.  That went well!  Making holes in end of box.  Ok, they look a little ratty, but they’ll do.  Insert hanger through holes and run ribbon spools through them.  Using lovey’s needle nosed pliers to bend one end of wire hanger up on on end of box and down on the other end.  Cool!  Doesn’t look too shabby.

Now I just put the ribbon through the slits.  Done  Oh my God!  I did it!

The only thing is, the the ribbons are the neighbors….not mine.

Postscript

Ok, so I decided to call the neighbor over for coffee and she said she would bring coffee over.  Maybe she doesn’t like my coffee.  I usually warm up the left over Starbucks that I get during the week because I don’t own a coffee pot.  I just throw it in a container every night when I get home.  Trying not to be wasteful. Who doesn’t like Mocha?

Anywho, I thought I would give the Martha Stewart Ribbon Organizer to her since they were her ribbons anyway and I really don’t ever use ribbons.  I even printed out Martha’s logo and pasted it in the box with my new glue stick.

She saw it on the table and didn’t say anything! So I said that I made her that ribbon organizer so she would have organized ribbon.  She seemed surprised and said that she usually just keeps it in the box that she brought over and she was afraid that the kids would get hold of the ribbon hanging out of the box, but thank you very much. Ingrate.

Now that she’s gone and I still have that mess on the floor, except now I don’t have a shoe box for my shoes.  I have made progress though.  I got rid of a wire hanger.  Only 500 left to go.

Should I clean this up?  Nah, let’s see what else is going on with Martha.  Oh look, a doily pillow!  I bet I could do that………

More closet mess by gserafini.

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